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March 15, 2003
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Iraq Brings in French Surrender Experts

The Skeptician (www.skeptician.com) reports that the French are good for something after all:

Faced with the overwhelming firepower and military might of the U.S. led coalition forces poised on its border, Iraq asked the French Government today to send so-called "surrender experts" to Baghdad.

According to Iraqi Vice President Tariq Aziz, the experts will "instruct the Iraqi military in all forms of surrender. Obviously, no country on earth has more experience with surrender or is more qualified in training others in this key aspect of warfare."

Iraq sought the French help so that they could surrender more quickly in this conflict than in the First Gulf War. According to Skeptician military analyst Rip Rowan, "During Operation Desert Storm, the Iraqi Army tended to make orderly and calm surrenders. They would walk slowly towards the Coalition forces with white flags."

"The French style of surrender, however, is much quicker. The French will teach them how to simply throw their weapons down and run screaming towards coalition lines, beg for forgiveness, and then roll over on their backs and ask for their tummies to be scratched."

French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin (who is a man) could not be reached for comment. Various news reports said that he was under his kitchen table, hiding from his dog, Vichy.

While the French continue to support the butcher from Baghdad and burn synagogues, I'll continue to burn the French.

Posted by David Melle at March 15, 2003 09:27 AM
Comments

THIS IS INSANE HOW CAN U WRITE SUCH EXTREME REMARKS . THE FRENCH HAVE A POINT OF VIEW .THEY HAVE A RIGHT TO OPINION. IT WAS NOT AT ALL PLEASENT TO READ SUCH STALE HUMOUR.DAVID SHOULD UNDERSTAND THAT SUCH LOW REMARKS R NOT WELCOME . WE IN INDIA DONT HAVE ANYTHING AGAINST THE JEWS BUT AFTER GOIN THROUGH THIS SITE WE CONCLUDE U R NO BETTER IN U R EXTREME NARROW VIEWS THAN THE ARABS . THE NEXT TIME U DARE TO WRITE SUCH LIVID CRAP DO TRY TO GIVE SOME RESPECT TO OPININS THAT SUMS U UP.

Posted by: J on April 7, 2003 08:14 PM

J,

I have a few remarks:

1) This article was a joke. Take it easy, breath deeply, and try to smile - you'll enjoy it.
2) Of course the French have a right to their point of view, and I have the right to mine. My point of view is that many French are hypocritical surrendering monkeys who hate the United States, Israel and Jews. If you haven't already done so, please join the boycott of France (click here for details).
3) I don't represent the people of Israel anymore than you represent the people of India, so stop generalizing and saying "Jews are not better than the Arabs". Furthermore, I am not calling for the deliberate murder of all Arab/Muslim women and children - yet the Palestinian Islamic Jihad, the Hamas, and other Arab/Muslim groups call for the deliberate genocide of all Israeli Jews. If you don't see a difference, you're an idiot.
4) STOP SCREAMING.

Posted by: David Melle on April 7, 2003 09:24 PM

Dear David,

may I translate J's comment and fill out the blank spots:

"THIS IS INSANE HOW CAN U WRITE SUCH EXTREME REMARKS."
you're a jew and your opinion is worth nothing.

"THE FRENCH HAVE A POINT OF VIEW."
as long as it's directed against jews.

"THEY HAVE A RIGHT TO OPINION."
as long as it's directed against jews.

"IT WAS NOT AT ALL PLEASENT TO READ SUCH STALE HUMOUR."
you're a jew and your opinion is worth nothing.

"DAVID SHOULD UNDERSTAND THAT SUCH LOW REMARKS R NOT WELCOME."
you're a jew and your opinion is worth nothing.

"WE IN INDIA DONT HAVE ANYTHING AGAINST THE JEWS BUT AFTER GOIN THROUGH THIS SITE WE CONCLUDE U R NO BETTER IN U R EXTREME NARROW VIEWS THAN THE ARABS."
I'm an Indian muslim but pretend in a most hypocrital fashion not to be anti-judaism, therefore as a "friend" I am oblieged to point my morals digit at you and bash at you because you're a jew.

"THE NEXT TIME U DARE TO WRITE SUCH LIVID CRAP DO TRY TO GIVE SOME RESPECT TO OPININS THAT SUMS U UP."
Long live suicide bombings.

It is always the same with those simplistic minds. It echoes thousands of times around the world by this jew-hating bunch of muslims and their european appeaser-friends.
And yes, those surrender monkeys of the Islamic Republic (to be very soon) of France are the masters of hypocricy only equaled by their outright cowardice.

Keep up your blog and best wishes from a rogue european nation.

Ephialtes

Posted by: Ephialtes on July 7, 2003 09:21 AM

What a funny article, how I chuckled when I read it.

Posted by: 3 lions on August 23, 2005 10:07 AM
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